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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29935533">Into the Morning Light</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/regenderate/pseuds/regenderate'>regenderate</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rescue [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Who (2005)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 22:53:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,443</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29935533</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/regenderate/pseuds/regenderate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor is sitting alone in a cold, dark cell.</p><p>Rose Tyler, bonded with the TARDIS and teamed up with Jack and the fam, will do whatever it takes to get her back.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jack Harkness &amp; Rose Tyler, The Doctor's TARDIS &amp; Rose Tyler, Thirteenth Doctor &amp; The Doctor's TARDIS, Thirteenth Doctor/Rose Tyler, Yasmin Khan &amp; Rose Tyler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rescue [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1983820</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>49</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Into the Morning Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>thank you to ThirteenOakdown for the beta! &lt;3</p><p>i've been writing this for like. a full year... it was going to be a short little one shot and it REALLY got away from me so here i am publishing an 18k fic. if you read this whole thing i love you with my whole heart. i haven't written a lot of fic lately but i'm proud of this one!</p><p>you don't have to read the first one in the series to enjoy this, just know that for personal reasons rose tyler is there and also i wrote 80% of this before revolution of the daleks aired so the whole prison break thing is not canon accurate.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The Doctor is in a cold, gray room. She doesn’t know how long she’s been there. She doesn’t know how long she’ll stay. A lifetime, the Judoon said, but her life is so incredibly long.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose Tyler is standing alone in the Doctor’s TARDIS.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A moment ago, she was standing with the Doctor, sorting through centuries of emotional baggage, and now she’s alone. Or, not alone, really— she’s got the familiar feeling of the TARDIS in the back of her mind, the lights around her shifting and changing, but a moment ago she had a physical presence next to her, a physical presence clearly in desperate need of care, and as much as Rose loves the TARDIS, she can’t just ignore that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She lets her emotions swirl around her for a second, and then she leans against the console, staring at the giant crystal in the middle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ve changed things up a bit,” she says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The TARDIS gurgles, and there’s a pleased hum in the back of Rose’s mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good to see you again, old girl,” Rose says, and finally she understands the way the Doctor always touched the TARDIS console like it was alive. She rests a hand on one of the shiny buttons and says, “Don’t suppose you’ll let me fly you? Just until we get the Doctor back?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That spot in the back of her mind surges with so many different things Rose can barely put them together. It’s something like longing and love and melancholy and affection all at once, and Rose is almost overwhelmed. She closes her eyes and lets it flow through her until it subsides, fading into the background.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll take that as a yes, then,” she murmurs, opening her eyes, and she stares at the console, trying to remember how it works. She knows a great deal more about time travel than she did back in the day, but she hasn’t been in the TARDIS since the Doctor dropped her off on Bad Wolf Bay. Hesitant, she reaches out to a dial, trying to think what it’s for—</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then a wave of assurance blooms in her mind, and then a vague idea of which knob to turn drifts into her head. Rose relaxes. The TARDIS has always had her back.  She lets go of her hesitancy and lets her instinct drive her, her hands dancing around the console. The TARDIS engines wheeze and stop, and Rose takes a breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s aiming for Captain Jack Harkness’s home in 2051, a little cabin on a little beach in Wales, United Kingdom, Earth. The image on the wall of the TARDIS confirms her location, and she pushes the doors open.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Meanwhile, in prison, the Doctor waits.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose is going to Jack’s place on specific instructions: Captain Jack is the first person she managed to find back in this universe. She had created a disturbance in the fabric of reality by crossing the void, and he had responded, guns blazing, only to see Rose collapsed on the ground with her new and improved dimension cannon in her arms. Jack carried her back to his place, laid her on his sofa, and covered her in a blanket.  When Rose woke up, Jack was sitting on the arm of the sofa, his hand running through her hair. Alarmed, she sat straight up, but then overwhelming dizziness forced her back down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Easy, there,” Jack’s voice said above her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jack?” Rose asked, too discombobulated to feel anything but relief at a familiar voice. “Did I do it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Depends,” Jack said. “What were you trying to do?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Find the Doctor.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What happened to the body double?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose gave a weak smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Humans don’t last all that long, it turns out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t have to tell me,” Jack said, a note of bitterness in his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Together, they reminisced and caught up. Rose told Jack about some of her adventures in the other universe, and Jack told her about everything he’d done since they’d last met— it was 2053, he said, and he’d been taking a bit of a break. It was comforting, Rose thought, to have someone so familiar back with her, to be in a safe place with somebody she had once been nothing but happy around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But of course, the conversation turned back to business.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you’re looking for the Doctor, though,” Jack told her, “I know where she is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The pronoun didn’t slip past Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regenerated, then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Always a lottery,” Jack confirmed. “Regardless, I think she needs someone right about now, and I can’t do it. Gotten myself too tied up in the whole affair.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wouldn’t tell her much. Only a set of space-time coordinates and the instruction to return to the same spot two years earlier.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This one’s big,” was all he’d say. “It’s her story to tell.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose just nodded.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Now, in 2051, Rose steps out of the TARDIS to see Jack running towards her. When he sees her, he skids to a halt, and then takes a few more cautious steps.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that Rose Tyler?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So he hasn’t seen her yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The one and only,” Rose says. It’s true, as far as she knows. She’s jumped between a few parallel universes, and she’s yet to find a proper 1:1 duplicate of herself.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you were—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was.” Rose shrugs. “Not anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jack looks at her for another moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not that I don’t trust you,” he says, “but I’m going to need you to tell me something only the real Rose Tyler would know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose thinks for a moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We met in World War II,” she says. “I absorbed the heart of the TARDIS and turned you immortal, only I didn’t hear about it for years after.” She pauses. “Sorry about that, by the way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jack grins.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Rose Tyler!” he exclaims, and pulls her into a hug. Hugging Jack has always felt a little like home to Rose, in a way that’s completely different from and yet eerily similar to the way the Doctor’s hugs make her feel. Suddenly, she’s exhausted, and she sags in Jack’s arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I take it the Doctor’s not with you,” Jack says into Rose’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Rose says, and pulls away. “Er, she’s in a bit of trouble.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you got the TARDIS here yourself?” Jack shakes his head. “Well, you always were impossible.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose smiles at that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not impossible,” she says. “Just good with time travel.”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor has been working for days on an escape mechanism. They took her sonic, but she thinks maybe she can make a new one out of the mobile phone that was too outdated for the guards to take notice of. Plus she’s been using her fingernails to shave bits of stone off the wall, little by little. One way or another, she will get out of here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(A tiny part of her, the voice in the back of her head she doesn’t want to listen to, knows it’s a delusion. If she breaks through the walls, she’s still in the vacuum of space. Even she won’t survive that.)</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose is in Jack’s sitting room for the second time that week and the first time in years all at once. There’s a steaming mug of black tea cupped in her hands. Jack sits across from her, elbows on his knees, staring at her like he’s seen a ghost or something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, maybe he has.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So why here?” Jack asks. “Of all and time and space?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose hesitates. She’s had years of experience with time travel and all the complications that come with it, but she’s still nervous about paradoxes. Carefully, she responds, “The Doctor needs help.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is he all right?” Jack asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose thinks about the Doctor, tired and lost and confused, disappearing with the Judoon. She remembers the Doctor on Gallifrey, standing alone, her posture betraying her exhaustion.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But all she says when she finally opens her mouth is, “She’s in prison.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Immediately, she can see the gears working in Jack’s mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She?” he asks. “Light-colored coat? Blonde hair?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have you met?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not as such,” Jack admits. “I’ve met her friends. Hold on, I have something to show you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He gets up and goes into what Rose knows is his bedroom. He comes out holding a slip of paper and brings it to Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I got this a while back,” he explains. “Recognize the writing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose looks at the note.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jack</span>
  </em>
  <span>, it says,</span>
  <em>
    <span> find the Doctor. Tell her to beware the Lone Cyberman. Tell her you’ll be there when she needs it most. Judoon— Gloucester— 2020. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Taped below this is a typed report from some agency or another: scanning it, Rose sees something about Cybermen, time travel, death. All par for the course, really.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the handwriting… the handwriting is her own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No idea,” she lies, making a mental note to write it later. It’s in a cursive she learned when she got bored and spent a decade studying calligraphy— Jack wouldn’t recognize it from their time together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I got that,” Jack repeated, “and then I tracked down the incident it was referring to. Tracked down the Doctor, only I scooped up all her friends instead. Delivered them the message, then started doing some research. He pulls out his phone and swipes at the screen. “Hang on, I’ve got pictures. This her?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shows Rose his phone screen, which shows a blurry shot of the Doctor crouched atop a roof, three people lined up behind her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s her.” Rose peered at the three others. “Are those her friends, then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The very same,” Jack replies. “So what exactly happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose tells Jack everything, save for her interactions with his future self— when he asks how she knew where to find the Doctor, she shrugs it off, telling him she was just lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time. It’s not, strictly speaking, a lie. She doesn’t know how she managed to land right in front of Jack’s house. She doesn’t really believe in fate, but if she’s learned one thing, in her years and years of being inexplicably alive, it’s that some coincidences seem destined.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And that’s it,” she says at the end, realizing with a sinking feeling how much of the story is still missing. “There’s loads I don’t know. Didn’t have time to ask, really.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay,” Jack says, leaning forward. He takes Rose’s hands into his. “We’re going to find her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose nods. She feels a hot tear drop onto her cheek, and she looks down, blinking it away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry,” she says, shaking her head. “I’ve just been looking for so long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay,” Jack repeats. He gets up and pulls Rose into a tight hug, the sort she hasn’t really had since her husband in the parallel universe died. She hugs him back, her eyes screwed shut.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks,” she whispers into Jack’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anytime,” Jack says. “I’m really happy to see you again, Rose.”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The TARDIS’s abilities are vast. Not vast enough for a split-second teleport to the Doctor, nor even to discover the Doctor’s location unaided, but vast. And the TARDIS’s telepathic connection to the Doctor is strong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sitting outside Jack’s house, dimensions cloaked by a thin blue shell, the TARDIS is not dormant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Telepathic tendrils are reaching out, out, across the universe, across all of time and space, probing, searching, waiting for the Doctor. They are aided by the residual energy left behind by the Judoon’s teleport, but they are, fundamentally, powered by the TARDIS.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This will not be quick work. It will not be slow work either. The TARDIS is above concepts such as “fast” and “slow.” It will, however, be work that fans itself out across time and space, and work that demands a certain amount of energy— an amount of energy that even the TARDIS struggles to muster.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It will be worth it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The TARDIS misses her thief.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose leads Jack back out to the TARDIS. He reacts with the appropriate mix of nostalgia and awe, and when he opens the door he steps back in surprise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s different.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Doctor says it can change,” Rose explains. “The one we took from Gallifrey was all white on the inside. Didn’t suit her at all.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lights flicker in the background, and Rose goes to the console. She’s getting better at feeling the TARDIS’s presence in the back of her mind— she feels it now, something in between love and desperation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll find her,” Rose murmurs to the large central crystal. “Now, what have you got, old girl?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a complicated series of noises. It takes a moment for their meaning to settle into Rose’s mind, a natural translation falling into place as easily as if it were her own thoughts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The TARDIS is sending out telepathic signals,” she tells Jack. “It’s sort of like radio waves, out through the universe, and only the Doctor can hear it. It’ll open up a sort of channel for them to communicate.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You got all that from those hums?” Jack’s looking at Rose with a new kind of respect.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sort of,” Rose says. “I think we’re connected, the TARDIS and me. Because of the whole Bad Wolf thing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You mean the thing where you breathed life back into my dead body and then left me alone in the middle of space?” Jack asks dryly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry about that,” Rose says with a grimace. “I would’ve made sure you came with us if I’d known.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not your fault,” Jack assures her. “And I made my peace with the Doctor years ago.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Suppose we’ve got to stick together.” Rose stares up at the glowing domed ceiling. “As people who can’t seem to die, I mean.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, our shared immortality is the only thing keeping here,” Jack agrees with a grin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose laughs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed you too, you know,” she says. “You didn’t leave me a clone or nothing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just makes it better when you get the real thing,” Jack says with a wink.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose rolls her eyes.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor is asleep when suddenly something hits her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t know what it is, at first. A feeling, maybe. A thought. It coaxes her out of sleep, and for a moment she thinks maybe she’s forgotten something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No. Not forgotten. This is something remembered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s only the faintest brush of contact, but the Doctor recognizes it. Of course she recognizes it. After thousands of years, she knows the TARDIS’s love when she feels it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She drags herself to her feet and looks out the window, half-expecting to see her blue beacon of hope floating amongst the stars. But she only sees the blank expanse of space, dotted with pinpricks of light. This is usually one of her favorite sights. Right now, she hates it. Usually, she sees it through open TARDIS doors, separated from the expanse by only a thin layer of oxygen. This is not that. The Doctor stares out, straining to see a dot of blue in the distance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then an image is thrust into her head, appearing in her mind’s eye so forcefully that she’s sure it’s not her imagination. It’s the sandy slopes of Desolation, the location of the Ghost Monument.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Right now, it’s empty.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then she hears Rose’s voice, hovering in the space between thought and reality, whispering to her: </span>
  <em>
    <span>Doctor</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She jumps to her feet.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The TARDIS beeps, and Rose runs to the console. She feels jubilant. The emotion originates in the part of her mind that the TARDIS occupies, and then it spreads through every part of her until she can’t tell whether it comes from her or the TARDIS and then she realizes: it comes from the Doctor. There’s a familiar edge to it, coupled with a buoyant energy that Rose attributes to this new regeneration.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Immediately after this revelation, Rose is hit with a series of emotions that she knows are entirely her own. Happiness, longing, sadness, emptiness, and above all: love. She closes her eyes and lets those feelings flow through her telepathic link in all their magnitude. If she’s lucky, they might find the Doctor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And they do. Rose knows she’s found her mark when the feelings intensify, underwritten by the Doctor’s telepathic signature.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ve got her,” she breathes, and Jack bounds up to the console.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Doctor?” he asks. “You made contact?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I did,” Rose says, exhilarated. “I made contact. It’s her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Rose Tyler!” Jack sweeps Rose into a hug, and Rose hugs him back. They stand in the center of the TARDIS for a long moment before stepping away from each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Any idea where she is?” Jack asks. He looks at the huge central crystal as if it will give him an answer, but it simply rises and falls in silence. Rose closes her eyes, but all she gets is a vague sense of frustration.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“None at all,” she tells Jack. “I think the TARDIS is as confused as I am.” She shrugs. “We’ll get it eventually.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not like we’re going to run out of time,” Jack agrees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose laughs. She used to be the kind of person who worried about wasting her life, dying without having done much of anything— and then when she started traveling she was the kind of person who was worried about dying young, before seeing enough of the universe. Now she was only worried about what would happen if she didn’t die, if she couldn’t die, if she saw everything there was to see and did everything there was to do and still had time left over— but she doesn’t like to think about that. She just keeps herself moving.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s starting to understand the Doctor in a whole new way. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor is perfectly still. Her hair, greasy from weeks without a wash, sticks to her cheeks, but she doesn't move to push it away. Instead, she waits with bated breath. It's only been a moment, but she's already convinced herself she imagined Rose's voice. Still, she feels a thread of something telepathic in the back of her mind, faint enough that she can convince herself it's just her own inner workings if she tries hard enough, and she closes her eyes and focuses as hard as she can on that. Sure enough, the connection strengthens, transmitting a jumbled mass of emotions, and for a moment the Doctor’s heart swells. Rose has found her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then the Doctor deflates. She doesn’t know how long she’s been in this prison, but it’s been long enough that she knows there’s no way to escape. She can’t ask Rose to risk her life breaking in, no matter what. She knows what she has to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She throws all her mental weight behind her next message: </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don't worry about me. Go find Ryan and Graham and Yaz. Make sure they're okay. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She sends the thought out, into the universe, and then she slumps against the wall. She did the right thing. Even if it means she’s stuck in prison forever.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>When Rose gets the Doctor's next message, she actually laughs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fat chance," she mutters. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What?" Jack asks. "What did you hear?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"She says not to worry about her,” Rose scoffs. "As if. And she said to find her friends.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If she thinks we’re just going to leave her in prison,” Jack replies, “she’s kidding herself.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know.” Rose chews her bottom lip. “But we </span>
  <em>
    <span>should </span>
  </em>
  <span>find her friends. They have the right to know what happened to her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you know where they live?” Jack asks. “Or anything about them?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No. Just their names.” But just then the central column turns a warm orange, and Rose turns to look. On the TARDIS wall just past the column, a map of Britain has appeared, somewhere in the north marked with a glowing dot and circular Gallifreyan. Rose opens her mouth, about to ask the TARDIS to translate, but before she gets the words out, the circles distort and shift into English words. It’s a list of names:</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ryan Sinclair</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Yasmin Khan</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Graham O’Brien</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are we waiting for, then?” Rose asks the air.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Allons-y</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Jack quips drily, and Rose laughs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know I’ve missed you,” she tells him again. She rests her hands on the console, then looks at Jack, who's standing back. “So are you going to help me fly this thing, or what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who would I be if I didn’t earn my keep?” Jack comes up next to Rose. “What do I do?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose hesitates, waiting for the instinct to strike.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Get that button,” she says, pointing. Jack does, and Rose moves around the console, pulling a lever, spinning a wheel. She calls instructions to Jack as she receives them, and the TARDIS begins its whir.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>When the TARDIS takes off, the Doctor can hear it, the sound echoing in her mind. It’s been the sound of hope for so long, for so many, and for none as strongly as her. This time, though, the hope runs cold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She will die in this prison. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Can she die?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t know what’s worse: dying here, or not dying here. She doesn’t want to think about it.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The TARDIS lands moments later, and Rose runs to the door, Jack close on her heels. Rose misses the Doctor, of course she does, and she wishes she were doing this under any other circumstances— but still, a part of her is thrilled to be back adventuring in the TARDIS, running from place to place and trying to solve a puzzle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then she bursts through the TARDIS doors and realizes her mistake: she didn’t check to make sure they’d land outside, in a relatively sheltered place. She trusted the TARDIS, and the TARDIS landed in the middle of a cluttered living room, sandwiched between a sofa and a television. And at the other end of the room, a family of four is having tea at a round table. They’ve all pushed back their chairs, and now they’re staring at the TARDIS, mouths open. One, a young woman with thick black hair and stars dotting her shirt, is standing halfway between the table and the TARDIS. Rose takes one look at her eyes full of hope and knows: this is one of the Doctor's. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then that hope turns to confusion, and the woman frowns. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Who're you?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose opens her mouth to answer, but she's interrupted by a girl at the table:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Another weirdo for your club, Yaz?" The girl’s tone is biting. Rose never had siblings, but she recognizes the dynamic when she sees it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It's not a club, Sonya," Yaz says. She keeps her eyes on Rose. "Are you the Doctor?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What?" Rose is too taken aback to answer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"She said she could change bodies," Yaz continues. “Or, you said that. Did you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Rose can answer, she hears the TARDIS door creak behind her as Jack steps out. Yaz’s gaze shifts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I remember you," she blurts. "Captain Jack."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You got me.” Jack winks. “How’ve you been?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"More importantly," says a woman Rose can only assume is Yaz’s mother, "what are any of you doing in my living room?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We've got a lot to explain," Rose says, mostly to Yaz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not without Ryan and Graham you don’t," Yaz replies. “We’re going right to their place, and we’re walking. I’m not going with you in that machine until I know who you are.” She glances over her shoulder at her family. “Sorry about the box. We’ll be back for it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is this police business, Yaz?” the sole man at the table asks. He sounds concerned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s right,” Yaz says. “We’ll be back soon.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like you were all the other times?” Sonya asks pointedly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you going to be back tonight?” her mum adds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have got to move out,” Yaz mutters. To Rose, she adds, “Let’s get going.” And she marches right to the door, leaving Rose and Jack staring at her family.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll be back soon,” Rose promises weakly. With a strained smile and a wave, she slips past the family and out the door, followed by Jack. They emerge onto a raised walkway: Yaz is leaning against the railing, facing the other way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who are you?” she asks, her voice strained. Rose can see the tension in her shoulders.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re friends of the Doctor’s,” Rose says. “We’re trying to find her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where is she?” Yaz still hasn’t turned around: she’s still staring out at the city around her. “Why hasn’t she come back?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s in prison,” Rose explains. “We have a telepathic link through the TARDIS, but we don’t know exactly where she is. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> doesn’t even know."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz turns around at that, a glimmer of hope in her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You can contact her?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sort of." Rose hesitates, trying to think how to explain it. "I'm connected to the TARDIS, and the TARDIS is connected to her."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How come you're connected, then?" Yaz asks. "Are you like her?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It's complicated," Rose says. "Look, we should find your friends first, and then I'll explain everything. Promise."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"All right, then." Yaz eyes Rose. "Let's go."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz leads Rose and Jack down a flight of stairs to the street. They trail behind her, taking in the city around them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I’ve ever been to Sheffield,” Rose says as she looks around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Jack asks. “I’ve had some great experiences here. Mostly in the twenty-second century, but I had a rollicking time at a folk music festival in the 60’s.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re here,” Yaz says, stopping in front of a townhouse. “Ryan and Graham’s place.” She goes up the front steps and hammers on the door. “Graham should be home, at least.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The door opens on a tall man with dark brown skin. He looks to be about Yaz’s age.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yaz!” he exclaims. “Didn’t expect to see you this late.” He notices Rose and Jack. “Hey, I remember you. Captain Jack, wasn’t it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The one and only,” Jack says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who’re you, then?” the man asks Rose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She says she’s a friend of the Doctor,” Yaz interjects. “Is Graham here? I don’t want him to miss anything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, come on in.” The man nods to Rose and Jack. “I’m Ryan, by the way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nice to meet you.” Rose follows Yaz into the house. They emerge into a warmly lit living room, complete with a sofa and two armchairs. One of the chairs is occupied by an older white man with close-cropped gray hair: Rose assumes this to be Graham. He looks up from his book as Ryan sits down in the other armchair, leaving Rose, Yaz, and Jack to crowd onto the sofa.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re back, then?” he asks Jack. “Going to kiss me again, are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You kissed him?” Rose nudges Jack. “What did you forget to tell me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought he was the Doctor!” Jack protests. “I don’t go around kissing every random stranger.” Rose raises her eyebrows at him, and he adds, “Anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hope it’s all right that I didn’t pass on </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> message,” Graham says. “Not sure how the Doc would’ve taken that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure he’ll deliver it himself,” Rose says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, what’s the news?” Ryan asks, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And who’re you?” Graham asks Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Bad Wolf,” Jack says in an ominous tone. “The—“</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose cuts him off with a laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t scare them!” she admonishes. She pushes her hair behind her ear. “My name’s Rose Tyler. I used to travel with the Doctor.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s never mentioned you,” Ryan says. Rose pretends it doesn’t hurt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He— I mean, she’s got lots of old friends. It’s not surprising I don’t come up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hang on,” Graham says. “I’ve seen your picture, though. The Doc’s got a whole album on her phone.” A pang of something hits Rose’s heart at that. A strange mix of sadness, warmth, love.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are you doing looking at the Doctor’s phone?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She gave me permission!” Graham replies. “Her hands were full and she needed me to find a picture. It’s not my fault her gallery is all out of order.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyway,” Jack adds, “it works out in our favor, since that means you know Rose is on our side.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So where’s the Doctor?” Graham asks. “Is she still alive?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Rose said earlier that she’s in prison,” Yaz says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Those big rhinos finally got her, did they?” Graham asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pretty much,” Rose says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s your involvement here?” Ryan asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose takes a deep breath. She’s not sure how to explain this— her entire relationship with the Doctor, condensed into a few short sentences.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I traveled with the Doctor a long time ago,” she begins. “I started out as a normal human, living in London, but this thing happened—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We were in a bad spot,” Jack jumps in. “Everything was lost, and Rose here looked into the heart of the TARDIS to save us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But it messed with my biology,” Rose continues. “But I didn’t realize, and then I got shut in a parallel universe—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“With a clone of the Doctor, no less—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“—and it took me five years to realize I wasn’t getting older like he was,” Rose finishes. “So then I was trying to figure out how to get back in this universe without destroying everything, and it turns out when you have a couple hundred years to do something like that it’s not as impossible as you think it is. When I got here, I found out the Doctor was in trouble, and I went to go find her on Gallifrey. We were just about to come back for you lot when the Judoon— space rhino to you— showed up and teleported her away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you’re in contact with her,” Yaz prompts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right, through the TARDIS,” Rose says. “It’s complicated, but basically I have a telepathic connection if we go back to the TARDIS.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And how do we know we can trust you?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose hesitates. There’s no way Yaz </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span> know, really. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The TARDIS trusts her,” Jack says, and Rose is instantly grateful. “We can take you back there and we’ll find a way to prove it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, where are you parked?” Graham asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My living room,” Yaz gripes. “In the middle of tea! My whole family saw.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’m really sorry about that,” Rose says. “I’m still learning how to pilot her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyway, Jack said he’d be there when the Doctor needed him most,” Ryan points out. He leans back in his chair. “Clearly that’s now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The thing is,” Rose says, “Jack and I are going to try and find the Doctor no matter what. We’re really just here to ask if you’d like to come along.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Yaz says immediately. She stands up. “I’m going.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Might as well go, yeah,” Ryan says. “I mean, beats sitting around here.” He looks at Graham. “Grandad?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Graham hesitates, then pushes himself to his feet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why the hell not?” he asks. “I miss the Doc as much as anyone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Back to the TARDIS, then?” Rose asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let me gather some stuff first,” Graham says. “For some reason, the TARDIS never has the brand of pickles I like.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oi, we’re kind of in a hurry!” Yaz exclaims, but she’s too late: Graham’s already moved into the kitchen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, I’ve got the rest of my life for this,” Rose jokes. This earns her a high five from Jack and confused looks from the others. “Sorry, just a joke,” she says to them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Graham emerges from the kitchen, rolling a portable cooler behind him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you going to roll that all the way back to mine?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t see why not,” Graham says. “If I can get it up the steps, anyway.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know there’s an elevator,” Yaz replies.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, has there been this whole time?” Ryan asks, incredulous. “You mean I’ve been climbing those stairs every time for nothing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Didn’t I tell you?” Yaz asks. “Sorry, Ryan, I thought you knew.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll forgive you,” Ryan says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Either of you need anything before we leave?” Jack asks Ryan and Yaz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m good,” Yaz tells him. “Half my clothes are still on the TARDIS, anyway.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mine too,” Ryan says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mine, too, if we’re being honest,” Rose says. It’s almost a joke, except it’s true: she really did leave most of her clothes on the TARDIS. Most of them on the floor of her bedroom, even: she’d never been the most organized person, and it’s not like she was expecting to be launched into a parallel universe. Twice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hang on, how long’s it been?” Jack asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have to answer that.” Rose grins, then adds, “Come on, we’d better get going.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The walk back to Yaz’s place is very different from the walk there. Having Ryan and Graham along gives it a feel of camaraderie that Rose hasn’t felt in a while, and she can’t help but be glad they agreed to join.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When they get back to Yaz’s place, the table is empty, and they just see Yaz’s mum washing dishes in the kitchen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m leaving again,” Yaz tells her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When will you be back?” her mum asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know.” Yaz looks at Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Soon as possible,” Rose promises. She’s never done this before: she’s been in Yaz’s place plenty of times, but she’s never had to look a mother in the eyes and tell her that her kid was going to be all right despite all evidence to the contrary. She’s sure the Doctor would have handled the whole thing better, but this is Rose’s first time dealing with family as a time traveler— she’d spent years traveling in the other universe, but she’d kept to herself for the most part.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t like it,” Yaz’s mum complained. “Swanning off to who knows where, and not an inkling of when I’ll see you again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m an adult now, Mum.” Yaz glanced at the TARDIS. “I’ve got my own life.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know, I know. With that </span>
  <em>
    <span>Doctor.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Yaz’s mum says “Doctor” with the exact same tone Rose’s mum used to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Tell Sonya not to move any more of her stuff into my room,” Yaz says. “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> throw away anything of hers that’s in there when I get back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on, then, give me a hug.” Yaz’s mum comes around the corner and pulls Yaz close to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re just like my mum,” Rose tells her once Yaz pulls away. “She used to yell at the Doctor every time I came back. But I always got back to her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then you know how important it is that you take care of my daughter,” Yaz’s mum replies. She holds Rose’s gaze. Rose looks back, hoping she seems trustworthy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz’s mum nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d better see you soon,” she says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You will,” Rose promises.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And when you get back,” Yaz’s mum says to her daughter, “you’re going to have to explain that machine to your father, or else I’ll never hear the end of it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz rolls her eyes and agrees.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Prison is endless. It’s nothing. It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>boring</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And there's nothing the Doctor fears more than boredom. Those gray walls, closing in on her: even the sky outside never seems to change. This is her future. This is her forever.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She told Rose to go find Ryan and Yaz and Graham. She still thinks it was the right decision. The Doctor has lived long enough: she knows what human life is worth, and she knows what her life is worth. The welfare of her companions always comes first. Even when it doesn’t look like it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But still, in her weaker moments she imagines Rose coming to save her, or sometimes Yaz and Ryan and Graham, or even River or Martha or Amy Pond: the door to her cell opening, a friendly face instead of a cold black helmet, warm arms around her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She knows it will never happen.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>They pile into the TARDIS, all five of them. For a moment, Rose thinks Yaz is about to cry: she walks towards the console with a familiar reverence. Ryan just drops to the ground at the base of one of the crystals as if he’d never left, and Graham drops his cooler and stands in the entryway, surveying the console room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All right, boss,” Jack says to Rose. “What do we do first?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How come I’m the boss?” Rose asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re the one who appeared in all our houses and said we had to find the Doctor,” Jack points out. “Plus you have the telepathic connection with the TARDIS, which makes you the captain while the Doctor’s away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose doesn’t know how she feels about that. She doesn’t really feel ready to fill the Doctor’s shoes in any capacity, but Jack has a point about her telepathic connection to the TARDIS. She bites her lip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right, then,” she says to the group. “I’m just going to shift the TARDIS a little bit to get it out of Yaz’s place, and then I’m going to reach out to the Doctor again and see if I can figure out more about where she is. You lot might as well settle in here while there’s time. The minute I find anything, we’ll go check it out. Got it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Got it,” Yaz agrees. She heads out of the console room, and Ryan and Graham follow. Rose approaches the console. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want me to go too, captain?” Jack asks from behind her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’d better not,” Rose warns. “Like it or not, you’re my emotional support in all this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's a scary sentence,” Jack says. He comes up next to Rose. She's looking up at the central crystal, but she can feel Jack's eyes on her. "In my capacity as emotional support," he tells her, "I have to ask when you last slept."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I’ve no idea," Rose admits. "I barely need it anymore, anyway." She looks at Jack. "Anyway, if I stop, it's like I'm giving up. I'm so close. I can't stop now."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Look, Rose." Jack puts a hand on Rose’s shoulder. “We’re going to find her. You know that. Just let yourself rest when you need to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose sighs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We at least need to move the TARDIS," she says. "Get it out of Yaz's mum's hair. Can you get that button?" She points. "Let's just go back to where we were when the Doctor disappeared. See if we can get any readings from there."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sounds like a plan." Jack slides along the console to hold down the indicated button, and Rose gets to work. The engines fire up, then die down, and Rose knows without looking that they're right back where they started.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What now?" Jack asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not sure." Rose closes her eyes. A lot of what needs to be done is invisible, and a lot of it is work that Rose has to do herself: she’s the only one who can pilot the TARDIS, and the only one who can contact the Doctor. “I’m going to see if we can track the Doctor’s signal.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good plan.” Jack frowns. “How are you going to do that, exactly?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve no idea,” Rose says heavily. “It’s going to be a lot of work for the TARDIS, I think.” She closes her eyes and feels for the TARDIS in the back of her mind. She’s met with a tired kind of love. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Sorry</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks at the TARDIS. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t want to ask too much of you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The tiredness disappears, replaced with a kind of longing. Rose misses the Doctor, but she’ll never be able to understand the bond that the TARDIS and the Doctor have. It comes across as a deep-seated ache, the kind of thing you’d need thousands of years to understand.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Right, then</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Can we trace the connection?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s no word from the TARDIS for a long moment: only the central crystal bobbing up and down, accompanied by a gentle burbling sound. Rose waits until the lights around her go from a soft orange to an intense blue, and a fierce determination arises. She sees, laid out in her mind, a glowing line: at one end, the Doctor, at the other end, the TARDIS. The line distorts, then tangles, as the TARDIS begins to move along it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s going to take a while to follow the signal,” Rose tells Jack. “It’s sort of like the Doctor’s at one end of a rope, and we’re at the other, and we have to pull ourselves along the rope, but it won't stay put, and we have to follow it while it whips itself around."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm not sure I got that,” Jack says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose rubs her temples. "It's hard to explain. But we're moving through time and space right now, and we can't stop until we find the Doctor. I don’t even know how long it’ll take."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jack nudges her. "Does this mean you'll finally get some sleep?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose laughs at that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I suppose so. My old room’s got to be around here somewhere, don’t you think?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want me to come with you to find it?” Jack asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m good on my own, thanks,” Rose says. “Night.” Part of her feels like, after such a momentous day as this one, she should say something more, acknowledge that this isn’t just another evening in the TARDIS with Jack and the Doctor, that those evenings happened hundreds of years ago and they were never supposed to see each other again. But she doesn’t quite know how to address all that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good night.” Jack pushes away from the console and disappears into the depths of the TARDIS. Rose watches him go, suddenly realizing how tired she really is. In the last day or so, she’s launched herself across the void between universes, seen people she thought she’d never see again, and found the Doctor only to lose her moments later. And now, after all of that, she’s responsible for an impossible search. She’s glad she’s here, back in the TARDIS, but there’s so much she doesn’t know how to handle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sighs. The console room bathes her with warm light, and she feels a little less alone: her bond with the TARDIS is one of the unexpected benefits of this whole thing. That and the instant familiarity that comes with having Jack around. Rose has often wondered, over the course of the last hundred years, whether she was wrong to be trying so hard to jump across the void instead of making a life for herself in her new universe. She could have made new friends, traveled all over, lived out hundreds of years on her own. She even tried, but it only took her a few years to find out what she’s sure the Doctor’s known for centuries: that kind of life is so, completely, soul-crushingly lonely, and if there was a chance at seeing her friends again, Rose needed to take it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now she’s taken that chance, she doesn’t regret it one bit: she had forgotten, at some point, the instant easy rapport that comes with the people with whom she’s been through so much. Even though she still misses the Doctor so much that it feels like a physical ache, she feels warmer inside than she ever did in the other universe. She feels at home.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor, lonely, alone, rests her head against the wall and shuts her eyes. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose finds her old room easily. It looks exactly the same as it always did: light pink walls, shelves filled with trinkets from her old life traveling and her even older life in London, the same old patchwork quilt covering her bed. She’s always suspected the Doctor sewed that quilt, at some point in their long life, but she’s never asked. She doesn’t have any real evidence, anyway, besides the fact that it doesn't match the rest of the room's decor: it’s just that something about the bright colors and mismatched patterns reminds her of the Doctor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stretches and opens her wardrobe. She didn’t bring much with her into this universe, a decision she regrets upon seeing the pink and white polka dotted shorts and tight top she used to wear to bed. Her tastes have changed— not much, but she's more interested in comfort than style these days. She reaches past her old pajamas for one of her old band tees. It's soft and loose: exactly what she wants. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The minute her head hurts the pillow, exhaustion overwhelms her. She curls up under the old quilt, suddenly feeling small and so very alone. It's not long before she drifts off to sleep. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor is standing on an unfamiliar beach. She’s waiting for something, but she doesn’t know what. She just knows that she has until the tide comes in. After that, it’ll be too late.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks out at the water. Something about it seems strange. It’s frozen, stuck in the middle of the wave. There’s no point in waiting, the Doctor realizes. The thing she’s waiting for, whatever it is, will never come. She turns to leave, but as she steps, she begins to sink. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Quicksand</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she realizes. She knows what to do in this scenario, but the minute she reaches for the information, it slips away. She flails, but the sand only pulls her harder.</span>
  <em>
    <span> This shouldn’t be happening</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks, but it’s too late for that. The sand engulfs her torso, then her shoulders. As her head is about to sink under, she looks up. Rose is standing above her— or maybe she’s not— before the Doctor can get a good look, the sand closes over her head, and she succumbs to darkness. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose is running. She doesn’t remember where she started, and she’s going too fast to see where she is now. She’s running to something, but she doesn’t know what: she forgot years and years ago. The wind stings her eyes, and still she puts one foot in front of the other. She should have collapsed from exhaustion a long time ago, but adrenaline is pushing her past her limit. As she runs, she hears a voice. It’s screaming, raw with emotion. It takes a moment before Rose realizes it belongs to the old Doctor, the one she first met, with the buzz cut and leather jacket Rose tries not to think about what might have caused that: it’s something she never heard in her time with him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As she runs, the screaming grows louder, more intense. Just when she thinks she can’t bear it any longer, a cliff face appears in front of her. Instinctively, she runs right into it, and instead of banging her head on a wall of rock, she slips through as if there hadn’t been anything there at all. The Doctor’s voice disappears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At first, Rose can’t tell where she is. It’s not like it’s too dark: it’s more like the place hasn’t been built yet. But then she feels wet sand beneath her feet and hears the rushing of the ocean and a sinking feeling settles in her chest. She blinks, and sure enough, when she opens her eyes, she’s on Bad Wolf Bay in all its glory, a cloudy sky overhead, a gray ocean complementing the gray cliffs. She sees movement and walks closer, cautious— and then she realizes it’s the Doctor, the new one, with the blonde hair, flailing as she sinks into the ground, and she </span>
  <em>
    <span>runs</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But not fast enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time she gets to the edge of the quicksand, the Doctor is almost entirely below the ground. Rose tries to yell, but suddenly she can’t: she tries to move, but she can’t do that either. She just stands there, stunned. And just before the Doctor sinks under the sand, she locks eyes with Rose, and what Rose sees in those eyes melts her heart. The Doctor looks sadder and more scared than Rose has ever seen before— sadder and more scared than she’s ever </span>
  <em>
    <span>let </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rose see before, probably. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then Rose’s paralysis lifts, but it’s too late. The Doctor is already gone.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor wakes up, still slumped against the wall. She hasn’t had a dream like that in a long time. In fairness, she hasn’t slept in a long time either, but she doesn’t think she dreamed like that the last time she slept. There’s not much room for dreams in her sleep: she only sleeps when she absolutely can’t avoid it anymore, which leads to a blissfully dreamless repose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She closes her eyes again. She’s sure this is somehow connected to the TARDIS and Rose: she knows the TARDIS’s telepathic footprint when she sees it. But she doesn’t know what either the TARDIS or Rose is trying to communicate. Prison has worn her down: she doesn’t have the energy to care anymore. If Rose and the TARDIS are coming for her, they’re going to be sorely disappointed when they get to wherever she’s held and realize there’s no way in or out. If they’re not coming for her— well, that’s good. They don’t need to risk their lives for her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>(Even if, not so deep down, the Doctor really wants them to.)</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose jolts awake. Something feels off— she can’t tell whether it’s because she’s still a little stuck in her dream, but there’s an aura of discomfort in the air. She reaches back to her bond with the TARDIS and finds it dulled— but then a thin tendril of information seeps into her mind. The TARDIS is dormant right now, using all of her energy to track and travel towards the Doctor. Rose shouldn’t worry, the TARDIS says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose is worried anyway, but there’s nothing she can do about it. She pushes her doubt to the back of her mind and stretches. She doesn’t know how long she’s been asleep, but she doesn’t think she’s going to get back to sleep now. She needs a cup of tea. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As she pulls on a pair of sweatpants and pads barefoot out into the hallway, she’s hit with memories of doing this back in the day, getting up in the middle of the night and creeping to the TARDIS kitchen. More often than not, she found the Doctor along the way. Part of her expects to see the Doctor now, to hear explosions coming from the lab or to walk past him reading in the library. But she knows she won’t. That Doctor is long gone, anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The TARDIS halls are dim, a reminder that it’s still the middle of the artificial night. Or maybe just a reminder that the TARDIS herself is sleeping, using all her energy to get to the Doctor. Even though Rose knows the TARDIS’s walls are soundproof at night, she feels compelled to walk as silently as she can, the metal ground cold against her feet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She finds the kitchen easily. The TARDIS is always rewriting herself, but tonight the path is as easy as a memory, and Rose’s feet instinctively find it. The door slides open without Rose even having to press its button.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s already someone in the kitchen, which Rose didn’t expect but realizes she should have. It’s Yaz— she’s sitting at the table in matching pajamas and drinking from a steaming mug. When Rose enters, she jumps.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry,” Rose says, hovering in the doorway. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s all right,” Yaz replies. “I just wasn’t expecting anyone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Couldn’t sleep?” Rose moves around the table to get to the stove. The TARDIS can give Rose water hot enough for tea at a moment’s notice, but Rose has always liked the ritual of putting the kettle on and waiting for it to whistle. It’s something she and Yaz seem to have in common: the kettle is already sitting on the stove, hot. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pretty much,” Yaz says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Me either.” Rose checks the water level in the kettle. There’s just enough for another mug. “Mind if I take the rest of the water?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go for it,” Yaz tells her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose opens a cabinet. The mugs she sees lined up are almost completely different from the collection that Rose remembers: there’s one that says “Kerblam!” in bright letters, another that looks hand-thrown with circular Gallifreyan all over it, yet another that advertises a Sheffield football league. One familiar mug catches her eye, though: it’s the one she bought for the Doctor in a department store so many years ago. It says “trophy husband” with gold print on a black mug, a little crown embossed above the text. Rose got it as a joke, and when she gave it to the Doctor he frowned, saying, “We’re not married, are we?” She’d assured him they weren’t, it was just funny, but that didn’t stop him from using it every time they had tea.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose takes the mug down. She doesn’t think the Doctor will mind her borrowing it, after all, and it’s a nice piece of nostalgia to bridge the gap between then and now. She pours her tea and picks up her mug— and then she hesitates. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All right if I sit with you?” she asks Yaz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course,” Yaz says. “It’s not like I own the kitchen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay if you want to be alone, though,” Rose says. She doesn’t know Yaz: she doesn’t know her boundaries, and she doesn’t know her relationship with the Doctor, the TARDIS, or even this kitchen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I like the company.” Yaz shrugs. “Usually the Doctor’s around this time of night, but—” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t finish her sentence, and she doesn’t have to. Rose understands only too well. She sits at the table across from Yaz and sips her tea. She’s expecting silence, so she’s startled into honesty when Yaz asks her a question.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How’s you meet the Doctor?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Blew up my work trying to save the planet from aliens.” Rose smiles. “Seems like a long time ago now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How long?” There’s a curious spark in Yaz’s eyes. “And how come you’re here now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A couple hundred years,” Rose admits. “I was stuck in this other universe, and I had a— well, it's complicated. I was human, or thought I was human, and I had this husband— anyway, it took me a while to get back here."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"But you could have shown up anywhere in the Doctor's time stream," Yaz points out. "Why now?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Someone told me she needed me," Rose says. "And I'm glad I went, too."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Are you in love with her?" Yaz asks the question point-blank.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Blimey, you're curious.” Rose laughs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Ex-cop," Yaz says unapologetically. "Plus, the Doctor's my friend, but I don't actually know that much about her."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I know something about that." Rose's husband, the human Doctor, told her most of his secrets eventually, but it had taken him years to feel comfortable opening up, even with someone like Rose. She continues slowly, trying to come up with an answer: "Anyway, it’s sort of a complicated question. I definitely used to be. I suppose I still am, but I don't know who she is now, and she doesn't really know me anymore either. We’ve both had years to grow and change. Plus I doubt she’ll be in any shape to date when we get her out of prison."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose pauses there. She doesn’t know Yaz, but there’s something familiar about her. Enough so that Rose feels comfortable turning the question around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How about you?” she asks. “Are you in love with her?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz looks away. It’s enough of an answer for Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not going to get jealous or anything,” Rose promises. “I’ve outgrown all that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know if I’d say I’m in love with her.” Yaz still won’t make eye contact. “But, you know. She’s something special.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She really is.” Rose knows only too well. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I know her well to be properly in love with her,” Yaz adds. “It’s just a crush.”</span>
</p><p>"That's what I thought," Rose replies. She's sort of teasing, except it's true. "Of course, that was before I became... whatever I am now."</p><p>
  <span>"You don't know?"<br/></span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No idea." Rose shrugs. "Doesn't really bother me."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How'd it happen?" Yaz is leaning forward with genuine curiosity in her eyes. Yet again, Rose is reminded of her early days with the Doctor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It’s sort of a long story, but Jack got the short version right.” Rose takes a deep breath. “Basically, the Doctor was in trouble, tried to send me back to Earth, I wasn’t having it, so my mum and my ex helped me open up the console. I looked all of time right in the face. Saved the Doctor— and Jack, for that matter— but I didn’t figure out how it had affected my own biology for years.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Realization dawns on Yaz’s face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's why you can pilot the TARDIS.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I think so," Rose says. "That's another complication in the question of love, if you're wondering. Even if the Doctor doesn't want me, the TARDIS does."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It's like you're part of her now," Yaz says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sort of, yeah." Rose shrugs. "Anyway, that's enough about me. How'd you wind up here?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I was working a case with Ryan and Graham and Ryan's nan, and the Doctor fell right through the ceiling of the train car where we were standing."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose laughs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That sounds like the Doctor," she says. “Careening into a situation.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m pretty sure she’d just—” Yaz hesitates. “What’s it called? The thing where she changes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regenerated,” Rose supplies. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right.” Yaz takes a sip from her mug. “She was all over the place when we met. Asked me my name, I gave her my title and everything, and then she told me she was going to call me Yaz because we were friends. After about two minutes of knowing her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds about right.” Rose feels less like she’s in the world of her dream now— she’s still remembering the look on the Doctor’s face as she sank below the sand, but it’s fainter now. She and Yaz talk for a while, comparing stories, talking about the Doctor. It reminds Rose of meeting Sarah Jane Smith, hating each other until they realized they had more in common than they thought, and then laughing over the Doctor’s silly habits. Rose hasn’t hated Yaz at any point in this process, and she doesn’t think Yaz has hated her, which all things considered is an improvement: it’s strange, though, to experience it from the other side, as someone who knows only too well what happens to the people the Doctor leaves behind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After about an hour, Yaz yawns. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I think I'd better go back to bed," she says. "Thanks for keeping me company."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course,” Rose says. “Sleep well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz shuffles out, and Rose leans back in her chair. What’s left of her tea has gone cold, but she doesn’t really feel like going back to sleep. She doesn’t need as much sleep as she used to, anyway: a few hours a night can usually get her through a full day.  Maybe even two.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, she stands up and goes out into the halls. The TARDIS is quiet: quieter than usual. Even when everyone on board is sleeping, there are usually some ambient sounds in the corridors, and it’s a little eerie walking around without them. But Rose has been too preoccupied to explore, and now she has time to herself she wants to see if her old favorite places are still around. She finds the library, which looks exactly like she remembers it, and then the game room, where she used to beat the Doctor at all her favorite video games before being absolutely crushed in something from 4,000 years in her future. The medical bay is still there, of course, but thankfully empty, and the Doctor’s lab, where he used to spend hours tinkering with electronics while Rose sat on the lab bench and teased him. After all those years in the parallel universe, she realizes, tinkering on her own, she probably has enough knowledge to get what the Doctor does in there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Past the lab is the swimming pool: this was always Rose’s favorite. It’s not a normal Earth pool, with white walls and shockingly blue water: the walls of this pool are black and glittering with stars, meaning that diving in feels, in many ways, like plunging into the universe. It’s an apt metaphor, really.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s still more to explore, but Rose decides to circle back to the kitchen. She’s been wandering for a while, and she’s getting hungry. Immortality hasn’t stopped her from needing to eat. When she gets there, she sees Graham sitting at the table, fully dressed, eating toast with jam and drinking a cup of tea. He looks up when Rose enters.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Morning,” he says. “How’d you sleep?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Better not to ask,” Rose says with a grimace. “You?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not bad, all things considered.” He takes a sip of his tea. “Nice to be back in the old TARDIS, though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wish it could be under better circumstances,” Rose says. She circles the table to get to the cooking space. “Think there’s still cereal back here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think the TARDIS keeps it on hand, yeah.” Graham looks over. “It’s mostly the Doctor’s, though, so not really my taste.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose opens one of the cabinets and laughs— she’s looking at a line of brightly colored boxes of strangely flavored cereal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What did I tell you?” Graham asks from the table, and Rose shakes her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’ll be eggs for me, then.” She finds a pan and then opens the fridge— she’s relieved to find a box of normal-looking chicken eggs inside. She takes them out and starts cooking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just as she’s about ready to get out a plate for her meal, Ryan stumbles in in a pair of plaid pajama pants. He looks half awake, and Graham chuckles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Looks like someone needs his coffee.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut up,” Ryan says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose tips her scrambled eggs onto a plate and moves to the table as Ryan takes her place in the kitchen, immediately turning on the coffee maker. Because it’s the TARDIS, and the coffee maker is from a billion years in the future, it’s ready in an instant, and Ryan pours a mug and a bowl of the Doctor’s sugary cereal before sitting down at the table. For a moment, no one says anything, and Rose eats her eggs in silence. She feels a little out of place here, eating breakfast with people who have no reason to trust her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz comes in a few minutes later. She’s already dressed for the day, complete with a leather jacket. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Morning,” she chirps to the room at large. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then everyone but Jack is there, sitting around the table. Rose still feels awkward, but Yaz, Ryan, and Graham are acting like everything’s normal, or at least as normal as anything is inside the TARDIS. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or at least, they act like everything’s normal until Ryan asks, “So, what’s happening with the Doctor?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose puts down her fork. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s complicated,” she says. “Or, not really, I suppose. Basically, the TARDIS is trying to track her, but it’s going to take a while.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hang on,” Graham says. “Can’t the TARDIS go anywhere in a second?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s only if we know where we want to be,” Rose explains. “We only have a thin thread of a connection to the Doctor. It’s going to take longer for the TARDIS to trace it. If we had, say, time-space coordinates, we could just go right there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So how long’s it going to take?” Ryan asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose shrugs. “I don’t know. Time isn’t the same in the TARDIS. There’s no telling how long it’ll feel like for us.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks around the table. Everyone seems to be processing the news. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” she adds. “I didn’t mean to be taking you off on an indefinite thing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry about it,” Ryan says. “We want to find the Doctor, same as you do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever it takes,” Yaz adds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you’re sure.” Rose still feels uneasy— there was a time when she would have said the same thing without fully knowing what it might actually take. And this wasn’t like normal traveling where they could teleport back to Earth at any time. This was a ride they couldn’t get off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose doesn’t have a lot of time to think about it, though, before Jack bursts into the room with a wink and a grin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Miss me?” he asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that how you walk into every room?” Rose replies. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll take that as a yes.” Jack sits down at the table and steals Rose’s fork, taking the last bite of her eggs. “What’s up?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Morning briefing,” Ryan jokes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“From our fearless leader, Rose Tyler?” Jack winks at Rose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm no one's fearless leader," Rose says. "Anyway, I was just catching everybody up on what we did last night.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great,” Jack replies. “Any coffee left?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And so begins the journey towards the Doctor.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Time passes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor sits, bored, in her prison cell. She contemplates escape for the millionth time, and, for the millionth time, decides escape will never be worth it. But most importantly, the Doctor sleeps, and she dreams.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She dreams that she and Rose are in a hot tub together. Specifically, they’re at the spa on Orphan 55, but when the Doctor starts trying to tell Rose what happened there, Rose fades away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She dreams that she’s back on Earth, seeing Rose again. She dreams about the time the Daleks moved Earth and the stars were going out and the only, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>only</span>
  </em>
  <span>, thing bringing her joy was Rose Tyler, running towards her. Except in the dream it’s the Doctor and Rose as they are now: older, maybe even wiser. And the Dalek doesn’t shoot the Doctor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It shoots Rose, and the Doctor watches her fall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She dreams that she’s with the fam, celebrating Yaz’s birthday. The Doctor loves birthdays. She’s gotten Yaz a jacket made of a shimmering fabric from the planet Klostov— she’s absolutely sure Yaz will love it. The four of them are around Yaz’s family’s table, but the room is filled with a warm glow that the Doctor associates solely with the TARDIS. Ryan and Graham have made a cake: it’s tilting to one side, and twenty-one candles are crammed haphazardly into the surface. Yaz takes a deep breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the Doctor wakes up, she wishes she hadn’t. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose doesn’t know how long it takes. The TARDIS is hurtling through time and space towards the Doctor’s prison, but time is lost in the TARDIS: Rose only sleeps every two and a half days or so, and she keeps eating breakfast while the others are having dinner and going to bed just as they’re waking up. Even Jack, who shares Rose’s immortality, still needs a regular human amount of sleep— but after a week or so the others fall out of synch as well. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, they spend time together. Rose and Jack get to know the Doctor’s friends, and the Doctor’s friends get to know Rose and Jack. Rose starts to understand why these are the people the Doctor chose, why these people chose the Doctor. Yaz is fiercely loyal but fiercely independent, a contradiction Rose recognizes; Ryan seems to be a good friend, with just the right balance of light-hearted banter and sensible consideration; and Graham adds an even-keeled voice of reason to the mix. They seem good for each other and, Rose hopes, good for the Doctor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When Rose does sleep, the Doctor tends to appear in her dreams: on the other end of a tin-can-and-string telephone setup, with the string getting longer and longer until she’s a speck in the distance, or else sitting in the passenger’s seat of a car Rose is driving, staring at a map until it liquifies in her hands and Rose stops the car, staring out into an endless prairie. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose tells Jack about these dreams. They’re both floating in the swimming pool, idly catching up— they each have hundreds of stories from the last couple hundred years, and even though they’ve been stuck in the TARDIS without much more to do than trade anecdotes, there’s still a lot more to cover. So once Jack finishes his story about a giant squid in Lake Huron, Rose stares up at the star-speckled ceiling and says, “I’ve been dreaming about the Doctor.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything interesting?” Jack asks, his tone suggestive. Rose knows Jack well enough that she’s not offended. She just laughs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not to you, maybe.” A moment passes. “Just little things. I mean, I’d do anything to see her again. But every time, in the dreams…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not the same,” Jack finishes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not the same.” Rose splashes at the water. “I suppose I’ll see her for real soon enough. Just feels like forever.”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor is eating yet another tasteless meal when bright recognition flares in the back of her mind. She knows instantly that it’s the TARDIS— her telepathic bond is back, and it’s stronger than it’s been in ages. She runs to her tiny window, half-expecting to see the same old stars, and she does, but— at the very edge of her field of vision, there’s a little blue box, floating in space. The Doctor can’t help it. She bursts into tears.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose feels the moment they reach the prison. She would have known even if the connection at the back of her mind hadn’t grown noticeably stronger: the TARDIS seems to wake up, with the lights brightening, the ambient noise gaining a sort of rhythm. She’s been in the library for the last few hours, reading up on the Judoon, but the minute the light shifts she jumps to her feet and runs to the console room, which is lit in a blazing orange, brighter than Rose has ever seen it. Yaz is already there, somehow., frowning at the controls.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re there, aren’t we?” Yaz asks when Rose walks in. “At the prison?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose walks up to the console. The TARDIS’s joy and nerves are mingling with her own, distracting her from her physical reality.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How’d you know?” she asks Yaz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Something felt different.” Yaz shrugs. “The TARDIS isn’t all that hard to figure out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s really not,” Rose murmurs. “All right, then, let’s see what we’re working with.” She flicks on the outside cameras, and an image is splashed on the far wall. Rose squints, trying to figure out exactly what she’s looking at. It looks like an asteroid, suspended in space, dotted with pricks of light. At the top and bottom, skyscrapers— or maybe starscrapers— jut out. The overall effect is of a crystal swallowed by hardened lava. It looks like a city, almost. Rose has seen any number of cities carved into asteroids, situated atop meteors, even bridged across space rocks, with each asteroid or meteor being its own household. But knowing that this is where the Doctor is imprisoned makes Rose’s blood run cold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then Rose feels a pang of— she can’t figure out what it is. Loneliness? Exhaustion? Misery? It overwhelms her. For a moment she can’t figure out where it’s coming from, why she’s feeling it, but then she realizes: the Doctor. They’re still telepathically connected, and the connection is stronger than ever. Which means she’s feeling what the Doctor’s feeling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You okay?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have to get to the Doctor,” Rose gasps, putting a hand on the console to steady herself. She closes her eyes, trying to block out the flood of emotions. “She’s really hurting.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz is looking at her with concern. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll be fine,” Rose assures her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Can we dial that back a little? </span>
  </em>
  <span>she asks the TARDIS mentally, and the pain dulls. Rose is still aware of it, but it’s not nearly as bad as it was before. “We’ve just got to come up with a plan.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll go get the others,” Yaz says. It comes out as more of a question than a statement— she’s looking at Rose with hesitant eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s probably a good idea,” Rose agrees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz leaves, and Rose turns to the console. Its light pulses, and a grainy hologram of the prison hovers in midair, just above the instruments. It’s not labelled, but the TARDIS gives her the information she needs: it’s a Time Lord prison, built to hold those who have committed the worst of crimes. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What did the Doctor do?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Rose asks the TARDIS, but she gets no answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The prison is huge, and they don’t know where the Doctor is. Rose is willing to bet that she’s in deep, too, regardless of what she’s in for. The Doctor is the sort of person who would try to escape, over and over, until finally her captors gave up and shoved her in their deepest darkest cell.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Rose doesn’t want to think about that until she has to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anyway, she’s jolted out of her line of thought when Yaz reenters, followed by Jack, Graham, and Ryan. There’s no preamble before Jack asks, “What’s the plan?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not sure yet,” Rose admits. “Suppose we’ll have to get in somehow. It’s a Time Lord prison, though. It’ll be near impossible.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s what the Doctor is, right?” Graham asks. “I thought you were the same as her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nah.” Rose taps her chest. “Only one heart.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then she hesitates. The TARDIS, lurking in the back of her mind, is giving her new information— new ideas. She turns to the console, pressing buttons and pulling levers as she speaks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hang on,” she says. “We’ve got a plan. Or, the beginnings of a plan, anyway. We’ll have to fix the chameleon circuit… Ryan, you said you’re a mechanic, didn’t you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Got my NVQ, yeah.” Ryan looks skeptical, and Rose doesn’t blame him: she’s about to ask him to use his knowledge of human machines to fix something that’s neither human nor machine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry,” she says. “She could’ve gotten this fixed years ago, she’s just been stubborn. Hold on, she’s printing you instructions.” Sure enough, there’s a clatter in the custard cream dispenser, and Ryan fishes out what looks like an engraved metal card.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Points for style,” he says. Peering at the engraving, he adds, “Not so much for legibility, though.” He tilts his head one way, then the other, trying to read it. “Says I’ve got to go down under the console. Don’t think the Doctor would like that. That’s her place.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, she’s not here to do it now,” Rose replies. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll come with you,” Graham offers. “In case you need a hand.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ryan nods his agreement, and the two of them disappear down the stairs beneath the console.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So what’s the plan?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s still forming,” Rose says, closing her eyes. “This prison is near-impenetrable. But I could get in if they thought it was official business. I’m going to have to convince them I’m a Time Lord.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait,” Jack says. “You’re not thinking of using a chameleon arch, are you? Rose, that’s dangerous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything we do is going to be dangerous,” Rose counters. “This is our best shot.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s a chameleon arch?” Yaz asks, looking between Jack and Rose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It changes your species,” Jack explains. “It gives you a new identity with its own backstory and everything.” He looks at Rose. “But you forget who you really are. You could lose yourself.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We could lose the Doctor.” Rose takes a deep breath. “It’s our best shot.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A formidable helmet is already lowering from the ceiling. Rose tries not to think about the risk she’s taking as she catches the metal contraption and guides it to her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is it going to hurt?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess I’ll find out.” The helmet is cold against Rose’s scalp. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to do this," Jack insists. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose doesn't respond. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She just closes her eyes and waits.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The arch switches on. It does hurt. Quite a lot. Rose finds herself gripping Jack's arm tight enough to leave marks— and then it doesn’t matter. Her self slips away. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The imprint of Rose that's lived at the back of the Doctor's mind is fading. She's felt it seep away, and now all she has is a vague idea of pain, like someone's crying out from the next cell over. And then even that is gone. Some of the Doctor's strength goes with it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stares out the window, where the blue box still hovers. She wonders if she’s imagining it.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rosaceamalupinnica wakes up on the floor of her TARDIS with a pounding headache. She blinks. How did she end up here? She must have been exhausted after her last trip to Earth. And maybe a little drunk. She picks herself up and looks around. Yaz and Jack are standing next to her— the High Council will be so disappointed if they find out she’s been making friends with Earthlings again! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well. She’ll cross that bridge when she comes to it. She still has another mission to complete before she can go back to Gallifrey. But the jeans and tank top she’s wearing won’t do. She’s not undercover for this one. She needs her robes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You lot will be all right waiting here, yeah?” Rosacea asks Yaz and Jack. She doesn’t know where Graham or Ryan have gone, but she wants to get this over with as fast as possible. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll be fine,” Jack says. “Do what you need to do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve just got to get changed, and then we’ll be landing in the prison.” Rosacea looks down at her tank top. It says “I’m with stupid” across the front, with an arrow pointing to her left— she’d gotten it as a joke, a bit of a souvenir from her time on Earth. “Somehow I don’t think this is going to give me any authority.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d agree with that,” Yaz says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosacea moves across the console room and into the halls of the TARDIS. The wardrobe is just a few yards down, the second doorway on the left. Rosacea enters and finds her robes where they always are: hanging at the front of the room, with the hat and collar sitting on a nearby shelf. Rosacea takes her time changing. These robes have a great ceremonial significance; although Rosacea has a complicated relationship with the Time Lords these days, she still feels a kind of weight to the robes. They give her authority, in certain spaces. They give her responsibility, everywhere. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She braids her hair before covering it with the hat and lowering the collar onto her shoulders. It adds a physical weight to the mix: wearing the full ensemble gets exhausting when Rosacea has to spend long days in the high court or at diplomatic functions. It’s not the reason she originally applied to go undercover, but not having to wear it every day is a major benefit of her new job.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks at herself in the mirror. With the collar framing her face and the scarlet robes trailing to the ground, she looks like a proper Time Lord, someone with the authority to walk into a prison and bring one of the most high profile prisoners out. She takes a deep breath. She's done thousands of missions like this already, and she'll probably go on to do thousands more, but she still gets nervous before every one. There's always a prickling feeling that something might go wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She leaves the wardrobe. Her human friends are gathered in the console room— </span>
  <em>
    <span>why </span>
  </em>
  <span>had she brought them with her, it was such a silly risk— and their jaws drop when she walks in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Didn't know Time Lords were so dramatic," Ryan says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It's one of our strong suits," Rosacea replies. She moves to the console, robes swishing around her feet. The TARDIS has printed her authorization, and she slips it into her pocket before launching the ship. The central column rises and falls, there's a wheeze and a groan, and time swirls in Rosacea's head, a strange sensation she'll never quite get used to.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor watches as her beloved blue box disappears. She stares out into the dark sky. The stars blink back. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The TARDIS lands. Rosacea turns to face the humans. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"This shouldn't take too long," she says. "There's lots in the TARDIS to entertain you, go for a wander if you want. Clear out of the console room, though, so no one can see you when I leave. I'm not meant to have you with me, strictly speaking."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We got it," Ryan says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Good luck out there," Yaz adds. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“See you soon, Captain.” Jack salutes her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not your captain.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The four humans leave, and Rosacea stands just in front of the TARDIS doors. They've reverted to the default metal slabs— there's no need for camouflage in a place like this. Rosacea steps out into a cold gray room. It's nearly empty, with blank walls and only a few chairs scattered around the floor. Opposite Rosacea is a brick of a desk with a bored-looking clerk in the middle of filing papers. They look up as Rosacea steps forward.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Name and purpose of visit?" they ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosacea musters her most commanding voice. "Rosaceamalupinnica, Lieutenant to the High Council. Here on behalf of the Council to temporarily remove a prisoner for further questioning. You should have received advance notice?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'll need your authorization paperwork," the clerk says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Of course." Rosacea pulls the authorization from her pocket and slides it across the desk. The clerk inspects it for a moment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Everything seems to be in order. A guard will be here to escort you to her cell."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Thank you." </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor hears footsteps outside her cell. This isn't unusual— guards come down every so often, and her fellow prisoners each have a designated exercise period. She's even learned to distinguish each inmate by the sound of their footsteps. The weeping angel is barely audible, with how fast it moves; the Silence has slow, heavy steps. The Pting quite literally bounces off the walls, rattling the bars of its cage. These footsteps belong to guards, though, with heavy boots and a brisk stride.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor hasn't actually seen a guard in her time at the prison. So it's surprising— surreal, even— when her cell door slides open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It's not the guard her mind registers first, though. The ceremonial garb of the Gallifreyan High Council is burned into the Doctor's memory, and seeing it now she's suddenly convinced she's going to be taken back to Gallifrey, experimented on, executed, interrogated. The golden collar, the red robes— all of it is a threat. The Doctor can't even look at it. She aims her eyes at the ground, hoping she doesn't look as weak as she feels. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Prisoner 036421," the guard says, pulling the Doctor's mind back to reality. The guard is a Judoon, no surprise there, big old space rhino with a formidable gun and a gruff voice. "Also known as the Doctor."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"The Doctor," the Time Lord repeats. All of a sudden, the Doctor forgets about the Time Lord garb. That voice— she’d know that voice anywhere. She looks up, hope blooming in her stomach, rising into her chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Rose?" she breathes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How'd you know my name?" The Time Lord’s voice is dispassionate, disconnected. For a moment, the Doctor thinks she might have gotten it all wrong, hallucinated a random Time Lord into the image of the very person she most wants to see. But no, it's definitely Rose. The Doctor knows that voice, that face, even the way she holds herself. So there has to be a reason their telepathic connection has closed, a reason Rose is looking at the Doctor with a detached interest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Suppose it'll be another question for the interrogation." Rose— or not Rose— the Time Lord wearing Rose’s face— looks the Doctor up and down. "We haven't met, have we?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor decides it’s best to keep her silence. She flicks her gaze back to the ground, and the guard snaps glowing red handcuffs around her wrists. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Follow." He turns, and so does Rose. The Doctor follows, staring at the back of Rose’s collar, wishing it would talk to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The halls are narrow and dark. Prisons are the same everywhere, the Doctor thinks. Every prison she’s ever been to— and she’s been to a lot— has had these same hallways. They’re walking for what feels like years, the Doctor’s bare feet scuffing against the cold stone floor. Rose is silent the whole time. The Doctor wants so badly to tap Rose’s shoulder, to make her turn around. Ask why there wasn't even a flicker of recognition in her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s like Orpheus,” she babbles, mostly to herself. She was in the habit of talking to herself even before prison, and it definitely hasn’t gotten any better since. "Or am I Eurydice?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose doesn’t say anything. Neither does the guard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s an old Earth legend, you know. One of many. Only Eurydice was in the Underworld. Is this the Underworld?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose stops and turns, a frown splashed across her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What in the universe are you babbling about?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nothing," the Doctor mumbles. Anyway, Rose turned, and the Doctor didn’t disappear. Maybe the Orpheus comparison wasn’t right. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They keep walking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It feels like years. The only sound in the corridor is the sound of their footsteps, one after another, plodding further and further away from the Doctor’s cell. The Doctor doesn’t know what’s going to happen to her next, and a huge part of her doesn't even care. Her life doesn't belong to her anymore. Maybe this is Rose, come to rescue her, but maybe it's the Time Lords, playing a cruel joke. Maybe the Doctor is hallucinating, seeing what she wants to see instead of what's there. She's had plenty of hallucinations during her time in prison, but she's known what they were because, well, the chances of any of her old friends materializing in her prison cell seemed small. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But a tiny part of her still dares to hope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That tiny, tiny hope is what carries her up staircase after staircase, through corridor after corridor, until they enter a small brightly lit chamber and the tiny hope expands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There, in front of the Doctor, is her TARDIS.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’ve fixed the chameleon circuit, but that doesn’t fool the Doctor. It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>her TARDIS. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She always recognizes her TARDIS. She exhales softly. It’s all she can do to not run into the gray cylinder and collapse on the console room floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But that would blow the whole operation, so she doesn’t. She just tries to hide the relief on her face as Rose approaches the Gallifreyan clerk sitting at one end of the room. The Doctor can’t hear what they say to each other— they’re speaking in quiet, businesslike tones. Finally, the conversation is over, and Rose turns to the Doctor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come with me,” she commands, her voice carrying the weight of the Time Lord Council. If she’s acting, it’s very good acting, but if she’s not— well, the Doctor doesn’t want to think about it. She just watches Rose’s robes swing as Rose turns around. Rose steps towards the TARDIS, and the Doctor follows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Entering the TARDIS always feels like home for the Doctor, and this is no exception. The minute the doors swing open, the Doctor is greeted with a sense of belonginghomesafety</span>
  <em>
    <span>love</span>
  </em>
  <span> rushing over her like a warm wind. It’s everything she can do not to break down crying right there in the entryway— it’s been so long since she’s felt any of these things. Her telepathic link to the TARDIS flares in the back of her head. She lets out a shaky breath. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rosacea lets out a sigh of relief as she approaches the console. She completed the first part of her mission. All she has to do now is stop her known criminal and notably clever prisoner from messing with anything on the TARDIS— well, the journey isn’t over yet. She pulls a few levers and spins a few knobs, and the TARDIS launches itself into the time vortex. For a moment, Rosacea is dizzy with the chaos of time swirling around her; when the dizziness subsides, she sees her human friends running into the console room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You got her!” Ryan calls.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mission accomplished.” Rosacea grins, but Ryan goes right past her to the Doctor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, good to see you again, Doc,” Graham adds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s—” Before Rosacea can finish, she sees Jack coming towards her, something small and gold in his hands. It looks like a watch— but before Rosacea can look any closer, Jack has flipped it open, and a golden light floods out— </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>And Rose opens her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t even have time to process everything that just happened. She just sees the Doctor— her Doctor— standing in the doorway of the TARDIS, flanked by her friends, looking… so incredibly small. Rose can’t explain it. There’s just something about the way she holds herself, the look in her eyes. She looks exhausted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Welcome back,” Yaz says quietly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We thought we’d never find you,” Ryan adds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah, I knew you’d come through,” the Doctor says. Rose hasn’t spent much time with this regeneration of the Doctor, but she can tell when someone’s trying to maintain a facade. Especially when they aren’t doing a very good job of it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C’mon,” she says, stepping forward and putting her hand on the Doctor’s arm. “Let’s get you changed out of that jumpsuit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They took my coat,” the Doctor mumbles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll find you a new one,” Rose promises. The TARDIS can do all sorts of things, after all. A new coat shouldn’t be hard. “Come on.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She ushers the Doctor out of the console room. For a moment, she thinks Yaz is going to try and follow, but Jack whispers something and everyone stays put. Rose is relieved; the Doctor is going to have a hard enough time even without the others poking and prodding at her. They mean well, but the Doctor is about to fall apart, and she won’t want to do that in front of her friends.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The TARDIS guides Rose through the corridors until they reach the Doctor’s bedroom. Rose has never been in here before. In fact, she’s not sure how much time the Doctor even spends in here. The door slides open to reveal a perfectly clean room, with a twin bed pushed into the far right corner. The bed is neatly made, with a blue duvet spread across the surface. It matches the clean blue rug on the floor. There’s a dresser and a nightstand, stained in a matching dark brown, with two doors to the left. Rose guesses they lead to a closet and a bathroom.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The door slides shut, and Rose turns to look at the Doctor. She looks out of place. Her red prison jumpsuit doesn’t fit her all that well, and her hair is a greasy mess. It’s her facial expression that really gets Rose, though. Her jaw is set, and she’s staring straight ahead. She looks like she’s still in prison.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doctor?” Rose asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor says nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Doctor.” Without thinking, Rose pulls the Doctor into a hug. For a moment, the Doctor flails, but then her arms tighten around Rose’s waist, hands clutching at the robes Rose is still wearing. “You’ve had a rough time of it, haven’t you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor doesn’t respond. Her chin is resting on Rose’s shoulder, and Rose can feel that her jaw is still tense. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose steps back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have a shower, why don’t you, and then we’ll talk.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor gives Rose the tiniest of nods. With robotic movements, she opens the dresser and pulls out clean clothes before disappearing into the bathroom. Rose hears the sound of running water a moment later. She lets out a sigh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t know what to do with herself while the Doctor is showering. She realizes she’s still wearing the Time Lord collar and hat, so she takes those off, resting them atop the dresser. She shrugs off the robes, too— underneath, she’s wearing a red dress shirt with a high collar over a pair of black slacks. It’s not how she’d dress normally, but it’ll do for now. Her hair is still braided tightly against her head. She pulls it loose, combing her fingers through until the hair falls around her face in waves. She’s sure she looks a mess, but there’s no mirror, so she can’t check. But by the time the Doctor emerges in a fresh T-shirt with wet hair, Rose is sitting on the corner of the bed, feeling like she’s in a stranger’s home. She stands up when the Doctor comes in, but the Doctor doesn’t look at her. She goes right to the bed and curls up on top of the blanket.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want me to leave?” Rose asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stay.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor is lying on her side, staring blankly at the wood of her nightstand. Rose sits back down on the corner of the bed, just past the Doctor’s feet. She doesn’t know what to say: there’s no script for a situation like this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor reaches up and pulls at Rose’s arm until she’s lying down behind the Doctor. Carefully, Rose wraps an arm around the Doctor’s body, and the Doctor curls in on herself. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Everything is wrong. It’s all wrong. The Doctor’s out of prison, on the TARDIS— but how many times has she had the same dream? The prison is impenetrable. The Doctor tried to escape again and again and again before she realized there was no way out. How could Rose just walk in and take her? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s no way it’s real. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor is dreaming. Her life has felt half-dream for a long time now, and this is the part where it shifts from half-dream to all dream. It’s why she felt so comfortable asking Rose to lie next to her: if it’s a dream, she might as well get whatever comfort she can out of it. After all, what are the chances that Rose, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Rose Tyler</span>
  </em>
  <span>, would be there? Crossing between universes was impossible. Sure, Rose had been on Gallifrey after the whole thing with the Master. But at this point, the Doctor is pretty sure she dreamed that too. And she’s so tired, but she knows that if she falls asleep in the dream, she’s probably going to wake up right back in the prison. So she just stares at the dark wood of her nightstand, counting every line, every swirl, whatever it takes to keep her eyes open. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose doesn’t know how long it is before the Doctor’s breath evens out into the sound of sleep. She just lies there, trying to process everything that’s happened. She never thought she’d see the Doctor again, and now here she is, back in the TARDIS, like nothing and everything has changed. Rose hasn’t really been this close to the Doctor before— not the original Doctor, anyway. The metacrisis was different. He was more open, more willing to become attached. The threat of mortality forced him to let Rose into his life, and before long he was bordering on clingy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the Doctor, the original Time Lord Doctor, was different. Sure, he and Rose had been pining after each other for years. Rose had always found him incredibly easy to love. And they’d hug every so often, or lie a little too close on the grass, or hold hands, but they never did anything that would have pushed their relationship out of platonic territory. It had been an unspoken agreement, but Rose understood why. Anything romantic, to the Doctor, was just a harbinger of tragedy. It had to be, when he knew he was going to live so long.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But now the Doctor is curled up against Rose like it’s nothing. She’s snoring gently, and Rose guesses it’ll be a while until she wakes up. Carefully, she sits up and slides off the end of the bed. The Doctor doesn’t seem to notice. Rose makes her way carefully out of the room and heads to the kitchen. She’s sure this is where the others will be, and she’s right. Yaz, Ryan, Graham, and Jack are sitting around the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How is she?” Yaz asks the minute Rose walks in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Asleep.” Rose shrugs. “I don’t know how she really is. She’s not talking much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How are you?” Jack asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m all right. Tired, I guess.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s been a long day,” Ryan agrees. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We should make some food,” Graham offers. “You know, for the Doctor when she wakes up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s a good idea,” Rose says. “D’you know what she likes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you’d known her for, like, a million years,” Yaz says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, but it changes every regeneration. When I first met him, he was picky as anything. Next regeneration, he’d eat anything, as long as it wasn’t pears,” Rose explains. “You lot know loads more than I do about what this version’ll eat.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She still doesn’t like pears,” Ryan offers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’ll eat just about anything, though,” Yaz says. “We’ve seen her eat dirt like it was candy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ve seen what cereal she likes, too,” Graham adds. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She liked that one ice cream,” Ryan offers. “Remember?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, right, with the colors!” Graham says. “She bought a whole tub of it back in America. It’s in the freezer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doesn’t she need something with substance?” Yaz asks. “Comfort food, maybe. Like when I had a bad day at school, my dad would make something special, and it always made me feel just a little bit better. Even though he’s a terrible cook.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We could make her a nice cheese-and-pickle,” Graham suggests.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pretty sure you’re the only one who likes that,” Ryan tells him. “Yaz, your family cooks, right? Know any recipes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know how to use Google.” Yaz pulls out her phone. “Does the Doctor like dahl?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She </span>
  <em>
    <span>ate dirt</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Ryan reminds her. “A home-cooked meal is miles above that, no matter what it is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fair enough,” Yaz says. “Dahl it is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before long, the kitchen is a flurry of activity. Dahl isn’t really the kind of thing that takes five people to make, so Rose and Jack decide to make chocolate chip cookies just for something to do. There’s a lively chatter as the kitchen fills with the tantalizing smells of baked goods and spiced lentils, and then the cookies are in the oven, the dahl is simmering on the stove, and it’s time to clean things up a bit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose is wiping down the counter when the door slides open. She looks up as the Doctor walks in. She doesn’t look much better than before— her hair’s a tangled mess, and she has a startled look in her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re all still here,” she says flatly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“‘Course we are,” Yaz says. “Where else would we be?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thought you would’ve disappeared by now.” The Doctor sounds more like she’s talking to herself than to Yaz. There’s an awkward silence: no one knows how to handle this new Doctor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you stick around, food’ll be ready soon,” Graham offers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why not?” the Doctor asks. She slumps in one of the chairs, staring up at the ceiling. “No harm in indulging.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly,” Graham says. He goes around the counter and lowers himself into the chair next to the Doctor’s. “I’d bet it’s been a while since you’ve had a good meal, right, Doc?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You could say that.” The Doctor’s still stuck in a monotone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know,” Jack adds, leaning on the counter, “it’s a miracle you managed to get put in a prison I’ve never been to. I thought I’d been stuck in all the prisons in the universe by now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, shut up.” Rose swats at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor gives them a weak smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess I’m special,” she says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The oven timer beeps, and Jack turns to pull out the first batch of cookies. Rose takes the opportunity to slip around the counter and sit down next to the Doctor. She puts a gentle hand on the Doctor’s arm. The Doctor flinches.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s just me,” Rose murmurs. “How are you doing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor shrugs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose pulls her hand away from the Doctor’s arm. She looks the Doctor up and down. The Doctor is curled up in the fetal position, her head on her knees, her arms wrapped around her legs. Her hair’s fallen into her eyes, which are staring straight ahead,  and her mouth is set in a hard line. Rose’s gaze doesn’t waver, and the Doctor flicks her eyes towards her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t need you babysitting me, you know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose sits back, trying not to feel hurt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just worried about you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to be.” But the Doctor’s body language defies her words: she pulls her knees closer to her chest and lets more of her hair fall into her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a moment of silence. The air feels tense, and when Rose looks around she realizes that everyone is watching.  It's clear that no one quite knows what to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Food's ready," Yaz finally says. Ryan starts getting down plates. Grateful, Rose gets up to help. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They eat in silence, everyone's eyes darting warily between their plates and the Doctor's fragile form. The Doctor, for her part, cleans her plate quickly and methodically. She stands before the others are half-finished. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Thanks for the meal," she says, and then she walks out as abruptly as she walked in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a clattering sound. Rose looks to see Yaz standing up, her jaw set. As she strides towards the door, Jack moves as if to stop her, but Rose pulls him back. The door slides open, and Yaz rushes out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rose and the others exchange uneasy looks.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor doesn’t know where she’s going. She’s just wandering around the TARDIS, trying to make it seem real. It’s just a dream, she knows it’s just a dream— but if she concentrates hard enough, maybe she can make the walls solid and safe. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s drifting past the rec room when she hears footsteps behind her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doctor?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s Yaz’s voice. It’s cruel, the Doctor thinks, for her subconscious to make her go through this, to make her look each of her closest friends in the eyes, to make her see the concern in their faces. It’s cruel that she must look at them, feel the warmth and joy of companionship, while knowing it’s all a lie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she turns anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Back in the kitchen, the Doctor hadn’t looked at any of her friends’ faces. She’d been avoiding it, actually: she hadn’t wanted to give herself hope. But now she has no choice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz is in sweatpants, her hair pulled back into a simple ponytail. There are dark circles under her eyes. The Doctor hasn’t seen Yaz like this— usually she’s fully dressed with her hair done before she even shows up for breakfast in the mornings. This information registers in the back of the Doctor’s mind, but she doesn’t have the energy to think too hard about it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you okay?” Yaz asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m always okay,” the Doctor says reflexively. She’s too tired to infuse it with her usual excitement, and she knows Yaz won’t believe her. But she doesn’t have the energy to open herself up right now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been mad at you,” Yaz blurts. She says it without malice, but the Doctor still feels a pang of guilt. “You let us think you were dead.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How do you know I’m not?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz opens her mouth, then closes it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I might be dead.” The Doctor is talking more to herself than to Yaz at this point. “Would explain a lot.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz looks the Doctor straight in the eyes. The Doctor can’t interpret her expression.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dead or alive,” she says, “you have people who love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then she turns and walks away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s too bad this is all a dream, the Doctor thinks. Yaz’s words would have been reassuring if they were real.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Doctor keeps walking. Eventually, she’ll wake up in the prison. Until then, she’ll explore her dream.</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Rose is looking for the Doctor. Or maybe she’s looking for Yaz, or both of them, if they’re talking. After they both left, Rose figured she’d give them time to talk— she finished her meal with the others, and only after the dishes were cleaned and put away did she go out into the halls.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now she’s wandering. She starts by going to the Doctor’s room, but the Doctor isn’t there. She checks the library next— Jack and Graham are there, deep in an argument about something or other. They look up when Rose walks in, but she just waves them off and steps back into the hallway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, she sets off without a clear destination in mind: she’s just wandering the halls of the TARDIS. For a long time, she doesn’t see anyone, not even Ryan: only the polished chrome walls of the corridor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then, just when she’s about to get up, she runs into Yaz. Or, more accurately, Yaz runs into her: Rose turns a corner and sees Yaz about three seconds before Yaz bowls her over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, no, I’m sorry!” Yaz rolls off Rose and gets up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve had worse.” Rose pushes herself into a standing position and looks at Yaz. She’s definitely been crying— her eyes are red, and the tear tracks haven’t dried. “Are you all right, though?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz avoids Rose’s gaze. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want the honest answer, or the polite answer?” she asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That bad, is it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s all it takes. Yaz has been bottling up her emotions, it seems, and all it takes to uncork the bottle is a few sympathetic words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I talked to the Doctor,” she says. “She’s not okay. She says she is, but she’s not. And she always says she is! She says she’s okay, and she’s not, and she goes and gets herself hurt, and—” Yaz draws in a shaky breath. “How are we supposed to help her? We got her out of prison, and she thinks she’s dead!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That last line takes Rose by surprise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry, what?” she asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She told me.” Yaz is close to sobbing by now, and Rose puts a tentative hand on her arm. “She said it would explain a lot if she were dead.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yaz leans in to Rose's touch, and Rose thinks back to everything the Doctor’s said and done so far. She’s been behaving a little erratically, and Rose has chalked it up to the shock of leaving, but with this new information… Rose feels a pang of sadness thinking about what the Doctor must have gone through that she no longer believes her senses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We have to go talk to her,” she says. “If she thinks she’s dead— who knows where her mind is right now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She might be mad at me.” Yaz grimaces. “Our conversation was sort of one-sided.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If she’s mad, it’s just because she doesn’t want to admit she needs you,” Rose replies. “C’mon, let’s see if we can find her.”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>The Doctor is lying on her bed. It sort of feels like her cell— a softer version of her cell, with no windows to see the stars.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s glad of it. She’s gotten tired of the stars.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She drifts to sleep again. When she wakes up, Rose is sitting at the foot of her bed, and Yaz is on the floor. They both have cups of tea in their hands, and when the Doctor blinks the sleep out of her eyes, she realizes there’s another cup for her on the nightstand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe this dream isn’t so bad after all. The Doctor is warm, her friends are there, she has a nice cup of tea. It’s gentle, she thinks. She’ll have to stay a while longer. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Over the next few days, Rose watches as the Doctor adjusts to life after prison. She slowly comes out of her shell— one day she barely talks, and the next she’s chattering about the friends she made in prison. Rose is pretty sure she’s including a Slitheen in that mix, so she can only assume the Doctor has been forced to broaden her definition of “friend.” Of course, Rose can still see the effects of prison. Sometimes the Doctor seems to shut down mid-sentence, or she jumps at the slightest footstep. Sometimes she lies on her bed, staring at nothing. But her friends are always there. If Rose isn’t at the end of the bed, Yaz is sitting nearby, or Jack is sprawled across the floor, or Ryan and Graham are sitting in armchairs they brought in from the library. They make sure the Doctor is never alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Until one day, Rose asks the Doctor, “Do you still think you’re dreaming?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doesn’t seem to matter,” the Doctor says .”If I am, I’m not going to wake up anytime soon. If I’m not, well, this life isn’t half bad.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s good enough for Rose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(And of course, privately, Rose is overjoyed to be back with her friends, new and old. Ryan, Yaz, and Graham are a lot of fun, and exactly right to ground the Doctor. Jack is the same as ever, and of course the Doctor-- well, the Doctor is still the Doctor, despite everything she's been through. Still the person Rose fell in love with.) </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>And eventually, the Doctor realizes it's not a dream. It's not. She had just gotten used to prison, to the routine, the monotony, that it had gotten hard to remember that her life had been anything different. She was an adventurer, once-- but that time seems so far away.<br/></span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waking up isn't what the Doctor needs to do. The real goal, the Doctor realizes, is getting to the point of adventure again. The point where she can run around with her friends, without being faced with the mystery of her childhood or the endless nothingness of her cell. The point where she has boundless energy and ambition. It's been a long time now-- even before prison, even before the Master's revelation, she was struggling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She almost forgot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The one thing she always believes in is hope. There's always hope.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even for someone who's lived as long as she has. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Later, once the Doctor has recovered a little more, once Jack has been returned to his house, once Yaz’s mum has been convinced that her daughter is unharmed, once they’ve all started going on adventures again, Rose sits in her room on the TARDIS and takes out a pen and paper. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jack</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she writes, making sure to use her finest calligraphy. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Find the Doctor.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Surely the TARDIS will be willing to let Rose pilot her for one more trip. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>like i said at the top. if you read this whole thing i love you with my whole heart</p></blockquote></div></div>
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